Monday, May 21, 2012

Mamavation Monday-Things are looking up

As you probably read last week. I declared myself a compulsive overeater by joining Overeaters Anonymous last week. And I have great news, I have been what "OAers" call abstinent for 7 days now

Every OAer's "diet" portion of the program is different, because we all have different "triggers". For me, I've been staying away from sugar, watching my portions-particularly of the unrefined carbs that I've been eating, and being mindful of how full I am when I do eat. I've been eating 3 meals a day. No snacks. I'm doing this because it allows me to feel what actual, legitimate hunger paings feel like. Which is something that as an overeater, I am unfamiliar with because I'm normally eating by emotion, or when I think I should eat because the clock says so-not when I am actually hungry.

I can't lie though, these past 7 days have been HARD. I swear, I've thought about food every second, from the time I woke up, to the time I went to bed. But not just any food. First it was cupcakes. Then it was a  Frozen Carmel Mocha from Biggby Coffee, the craziest part-I DON'T EVEN LIKE COFFEE! But OAers that stay abstinent tell me that it gets better, so I'm having faith in that, praying to my higher power, and attending meetings. I also think that being abstinent is easier for me to stick to than a "diet" or a "lifestyle change" because OA made it clear to me that I don't just want to be skinny, but that I have a disease, a compulsion to overeat that is preventing me from being skinny/healthy/insert other positive word here; and I refuse to succumb to a disease. I have to treat it, and the way to treat the disease of compulsive overeating is to remain abstinent. So that's what I'm going to do.

I think the biggest motivator is that the hard work of abstinence is paying off. This week I lost 3.4 pounds! AND one of my coworkers came up to me and told me that my pants are starting to look baggy! Score!

This week I'm going to work on:
  • Staying abstinent
  • Working out more
  • Working more of the steps
  • Finding a church, so I can continue to grow spiritually
Wishing all of you a fabulous week!

“This post is sponsored by Mamavation – a community dedicated to obesity prevention & weight loss for women and I’m writing this to be entered into a giveaway”

Monday, May 14, 2012

Mamavation Monday-I'm a Food Addict

Despite my best laid plans this past week, I gained 0.4 lbs. I'm okay with it, because I deserve it. This past week, I spent most of my days doing really well, only to binge myself to sleep at night. It has been a really sick vicious cycle.

Saturday night, Little Man wanted  watch our local cable access channel, Channel 3, because he says that it's the "pretty music" channel (other than that it's a power point presentation about things going on around the area). While I was watching I saw an "ad" for Overeaters Anonymous (OA). I'm always looking for what is going to "fix" me and my eating issues, so I ventured over to their website, because I've always known I've had a problem with food. I mean, isn't that why we're all part of Mamavation in the first place? There's a reason I can't stick to a "diet", or a "lifestyle change" for more than a few hours-or at most a few days. There's a reason why in my teen years I was anorexic, and then bulimic. There's a reason why I'm going on these daily binges.

After browsing the OA website, I decided that it would be in my best interest to go to a meeting. So I did.

And I'm glad I did.

Last night, I learned a lot about myself, merely through other people telling their stories. I saw myself in every single one of them, in one way or another, and I started connecting the dots.

I'm an addict. A food addict. It must have started when I was little, or maybe I was born with this, because one of my earliest memories (I must have been 4 or 5) is hiding under the table while my mom was in the shower eating stick after stick of butter. Then in high school, when I knew that boys were looking at me (and seeing my fat rolls), I was able to gain control of my eating by switching addictions. Instead of eating food, I started drinking and getting high (you would have never guessed, I was a straight A student and had "my shit together"). Now, since it's not socially acceptable to be a drunk, drug addict, mother, I've got nothing left to do but eat to quell my problems. Which is why I'm having trouble sticking to a "diet". 

I came to all of these conclusions in under an hour. It was kind of cathartic being my own psychologist. :)

So now that I've mastered Step One of the 12 Steps, the one where you admit that you have a problem, my next course of action is to identify the foods that I'm addicted to so I can abstain. The foods that, when I eat them, set off a vicious cycle of binge eating. So that's what I'll be working on this week. I've already got a few things on the list-deep dish pizza, and butter, and there's more than those-I just have to figure them out.

Wishing you all a fabulous week.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Mamavation Monday-Finding My Motivation AGAIN....

I'm sure that the one thing we can all agree on is that one of the biggest parts of the weight loss battle is finding your motivation. Mine comes and goes, and I really wish it would stay--I mean, when it's here I lose weight, and when it's gone, I don't. Which is frustrating.

But yesterday I had a wake up call. Everything I put on made me look like sausage links, bumps and lumps everywhere. And then I noticed how hard it was becoming hard just to put the damn dishes away--bending over I felt pressure in my lungs. It grossed me out, feeling like that is just not acceptable, particularly at 26. And then it hit me, I've gotta do something. I can't play with my son when I can barely put the dishes away. Not to mention, I hate having sex with my husband because bits that shouldn't wobble, are MORE than wobbling--it's just not hot. And because it's not hot, I hold out. And that doesn't make him happy....

This is what I look like now. These were taken yesterday, and mortified me.

So here's the plan...

Food: I'm going to watch my portion sizes--this is my biggest battle. Because if you tell me I can't have something (i.e. pizza), I'm going to run out and eat 40 pounds of it. I'll be counting points+ values in coordination with Weight Watchers.

And then comes the exercise that I have to rediscover a love for, because I really don't want to get off my lazy ass and do it, but know that once I start I won't want to stop. Fickle relationship exercise and I have. So....

Exercise: I'm going to start doing TurboFire again. But I'm going to do it as a hybrid with ChaLEAN Extreme in hopes that new muscle will incinerate the fat that's sitting on top of it.

Today, I weigh 174 pounds. I can't wait to see that number drop next week! In the meantime, I'm going to attempt to use this blog as my personal accountability space. Posting what I'm eating, and exercising every day.

Wishing everyone a week of losses!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Mamavation Monday - Feelings of Failure

About 2 weeks ago, I hit a big milestone at Weight Watchers. I lost 10% of my body weight. It was a big deal for me. So big of a deal that I celebrated by ordering pizza. Probably not the smoothest of moves, but I did.

The only thing is, ever since that day I've been depressed. Almost like I am sad to see 10% of myself go. And with that depression, I've eaten every thing in my path, and then whatever else I could find. So much so that as of last Thursday I was up 4.6 lbs. Even through the #2weekchallenge, though I was working out, I was chowing down. Thus, I only had a meager loss of inches and pounds. And I'm dissappointed in myself.

But today I made a decision. I'm starting over. I'm committing to 30 days of consistancy. Today I've eaten better than I have in the past 2 weeks, and I also worked out (I've been slackin on that since the challenge ended). I'm commited to finishing Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30 even if it kills me (it almost did today, my legs are on FIRE!). But 30 days, what's thirty days, right? I'm going to pull this off. I have to.

Wishing you all a great week!

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Mamavation Monday - Loss Again

Sorry I'm late! I meant to do my post yesterday and attend MamavationTV last night. I know that Eden Fantasies always brings a good show! However, my hubby was home with me (for once) and we had a little calorie burning "homework" to do. Hehe. :)

Anyways, this past week I lost 2 pounds! Yahoo! According to Weight Watchers I officially lost 10% of my body weight, and then some. Though, I lost my true 10% a loooong time ago. Since I'm down 40 lbs post delivery, and I believe somewhere right around 27 lbs since I joined Mamavation. Sadly, though I am afraid I've gained back that 2 lbs and then some. As part of the #2WeekChallenge and have been putting in my workouts, but I have been insatiably hungry. I swear, I've been eating all freaking day long. So I'm really afraid I'm sabotaging myself--but I can't stop. I try every day. And then I end up eating all day long again. Darn vicious cycle. One thing is for sure though. I AM NOT BUYING PAZACKIS TODAY! So that should save me a crap ton of calories!

Wishing you all your best week ever!

Monday, February 13, 2012

Mamavation Monday- Return from being MIA

This past week, I lost another 1.2 lbs, taking me up to 5.2 pounds down since the last time I posted. Which was, a while ago. For a total of 26.2 since I joined Mamavation.

Things are still crazy, people are still sick/recovering in my family. January ended with ALL of us catching Norovirus. AKA, the virus from hell. For almost an entire week someone was in some sort of Gastro distress. Leading to me taking the baby to the hospital while I was still rocking a 103 fever, and my husband was stuck at home throwing up with diarrhea. This was the timeline:

Thursday: Lil Man throws up, a couple times--thankfully it was after Weight Watchers and the grocery store.
Friday: Lil Man appears to be doing better.
Wee Hours of Saturday Morning: I start throwing up so long and hard that I rupture almost all of the capillaries in my face.
Saturday Early Evening: Lil Man starts puking like something out of the exorcist. Husband tells me he's starting to feel crappy.
Saturday Evening: Baby ends up in hospital. See Photo
Sunday Night: My mother in law who drove Lil Man and me to the hospital so I could attempt to catch his vomit, starts throwing up.

It was insane. Thankfully we've all recovered well. AND it helped me lose 4 pounds that I didn't put back on. Score! This week, I'm hoping to reach my goal of losing 10% of my body weight at weight watchers. I've been trying to get that darn keychain for far too long now! And if I lose at least .6 this coming week, I'll make it!

I'm also in for the next round of the Two Week Challenge. This is my third challenge and I'm ready to win one of those prizes! Here are my measurements as I start off the challenge:

Weight 163.8 lbs
Waist 35.5 in
Hip 41in
Thighs 24 in on both
Arms 13 in on both

But now it's time guessed it!

The Mamavation Question of the Week sponsored by us, Mamavation!
What is your favorite way to relax?

My favorite way to relax, is to literally pretend I'm dead. Seriously. I'm not trying to be a creeper, my favorite way to relax is in Corpse Pose! For me, Corpse Pose is the most relaxing thing I can possibly do. Here's why:
1. It's time to myself. No kid. No hubby. No one to drive me insane.
2. I get to focus on my breathing and just slooooooowwwwww down for once.
3. While in corpse pose. I tense my entire body, and then release one muscle group at a time. It feels amazing, heck, almost orgasmic. And then I lay there in bliss after all of my muscle groups have released.
4. It's ten minutes of my time, where I get to be outside myself. Outside of my brain, that is incessantly running. Time when I give up on thinking (so don't interrupt me, I can't be held responsible for any actions I could potentially take against said intterupting party).

Wishing everyone a fabulous week and best of losses to my fellow challengers!

Monday, January 16, 2012

Mamavation Monday--Feelings of Discouragement

I'm starting to get discouraged, and yes, a little pissed off. I've been doing Weight Watchers (again) since October and I've only lost 11 pounds. And I've followed the program precisely. This week when I gained .8 lbs when I weighed in, I was LIVID. I was (insert multiple expletives here) kind of pissed. I had another perfect week, complete with more (cardio) workouts. My 25 year old body should be a fat incinerating MACHINE, not deceiving me...WTH.
This is about the 5th time this has happened to me since October.

(Up on Soapbox)

I'm giving up on Weight Watchers, on giving up on PointsPlus values, I believe it's a sham. If it helps you, that's great--I'm all for people losing weight, however, I believe WW is a money making machine more than helping people put up numbers.

Here's why, The PointsPlus program does NOTHING to back the scientific fact of: a calorie, is a calorie, is a calorie. They are declaring fruits and veggies to be "FREE", implies that it doesn't make a difference how much you eat of them. AND good old WW is doing little to encourage proper portion sizes--because, yes my friends, that pear you just ate can make you gain weight just as much as a candy bar, if you are eating too many calories. I cannot tell you how many times I have heard "eat a much as you want" when it comes to veggies and specific (lower carb) fruits at my meeting.

So, I'm done. I'm using a combo of MyFitnessPal to track my calories--including those of fruits and veggies, and my BodyBugg to see how many I'm burning. Aiming for a deficit of 1,000 calories per day. And I'm working out at least 30 minutes a day 6 days a week with a mix of strength and cardio.

I'm not doing a mid-challenge post, because I'm hoping to be blown away next Monday. I need some sort of big progress marker to keep me going.

(Step Down from Soapbox)

It's time for the Mamavation Question of the Week! This week's question is brought to us by The Chia CO!

What are your latest healthy food discoveries?

Hum. This one is hard, I've been eating the same stuff a lot lately, and I haven't ventured much out of my comfort zone because I know exactly how many calories I'm consuming. However, the biggest healthy food discovery I have made lately is less of a food, and more of a food website, with TONS of healthy and low calorie recipes. It's This site has AWESOME recipes. I've tried a few and they were raves: The Spinach Roll-Ups, Roasted Green Beans, and Baked Potato Soup. For those of you who are doing Weight Watchers, it even has the old points and the new points plus values listed for you. (Not that I care! LOL!) If I had one healthy eating website to recommend, besides Mamavation of course, I would say SkinnyTaste hands down, 110% that Gina chick really knows what she's doing! :)

Wishing you all a fabulous week of losses! Even the Weight Watchers members! :)



This post is sponsored by The Chia Co and I’m writing this to be entered into a giveaway hosted by Mamavation – a community dedicated to obesity prevention & weight loss for women

Monday, January 9, 2012

Mamavation Monday--Two Week Challenge Part Deux

Hey everyone! I hope your holidays were fabulous! Things have been really crazy over here, for starters my Grandma-In-Law and one of my primary babysitters for the baby was diagnosed with colon cancer, then my husband's former step-dad and brother-in-law's father had a stroke. The baby puked all over the place on New Years Day, getting me sick afterwards. And my pregnancy was a false alarm, I had a chemical pregnancy (the technical term for an early miscarriage) and am no longer pregnant.

Happily the one thing that has stayed consistant in my life has been my quest to shed the extra pounds. Since my last post, I lost 2.8 lbs the week before last, and last week I lost another 1.6, for a grand total of of -4.4 lbs the past two weeks and down 21 since I joined Mamavation. This morning I even went from the fifth notch, to the sixth notch on my belt! Woot Woot! This week, my goal is to break the 170 lb barrier that I've been beating my head up against for the past 11 months. I'll see you on the other side next week!

I'm excited for the this two week challenge, doing the one before Christmas put me in a good spot for the holidays, and I'm ready to be in an even better place to start the new year! Here are my starting stats:

Weight: 170.4 lbs.
Waist: 36.75 inches
Hips: 41.75 inches
Legs: 24.25 inches
And just for giggles, Arms: 13.5 inches

Good Luck to all of my fellow challengers!
But enough about me, It's time for the Mamavation Question of the Week!

This week's blogging carnival and MamavationTV is sponsored by Budhi Skin Care. They ask:
What do you find most challenging in skin care?
The thing I find most challenging about skin care is finding the right product for my skin type. I have skin that can't make up it's mind. And last time I checked NOT ONE bottle of product is labeled for "indicisive skin". Let me explain, one day I'm oily, the next day I'm dry, then I have acne and blackheads, and on top of all that I have rosecea so I can be sensitive, sending me right back to oily, dry, or acne.
Vicious, annoying, cycle.
So finding a product(s) that will balence my skin, that ends the vicious cycle is the most troublesome, and hard to do

Wishing you all a wonderful week of losses!